


Enabled Awkwardness

by moonlite



Category: Goyo: Ang Batang Heneral (2018)
Genre: M/M, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-06
Updated: 2018-10-06
Packaged: 2019-07-26 00:31:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16208915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonlite/pseuds/moonlite
Summary: They don't always meet half way.Actually, they never did.





	1. i. 1898

**Author's Note:**

> This is literally out of nowhere and with no actual planning. Basta nabuhay. So sorry kung walang patutunguhan

1898

"Señor Mabini, kung inyo pong mamarapatin -"

"Señor Aguinaldo. Napagusapan na natin ito. Ang independencia ng bansa ay higit na mas mahalaga kaysa sa pahinga,"

It has been like this for the past few days; Aguinaldo insisting that Mabini go to bed. The man has been working tirelessly for the past few weeks and he is more concerned about the man than he is of the country. If the very man in question falls down in exhaustion, the country is as good as dead.

And Aguinaldo knows it.

"Pule, makinig ka naman sa akin kahit na isang beses lang. Kahit ngayon lang," he tried with a softer tone, coaxing a child but he is only met with a glare.

"Ilang beses ka na bang hindi nakikinig sa akin, Miong?" well that shut him up. He has been pretty insistent about Buencamino's stay in the cabinet - same with Paterno.

"Babagsak ang bansa kung wala k-"

"Bumabagsag na ang bansa dahil sa lahat ng 'di mo pakikinig sa akin, señor presidente!" the world stopped. The night seemed so still already but the world then stopped and Miong felt the world close in on him. They are alone but it felt like the world is looking at him - his naked form a comedy for everyone to see.

Then as cold as the night, his body felt the warmest he can feel, the tips of his fingers itching with a certain kind of tingle he's only ever felt in war, the kind of pumping in his veins that can only be described as a storm. His eyes narrowed in on the sole man in the room and he felt his mouth open but he isn't there. Everything around him is mute and all he can hear is the rush of blood in his ears. He can almost feel a pulse beheath his eye until he found himself walking away, slamming a door behind him as his feet carried him deep, deep, deeper into the forest, heart a heavy weight of unnecessity.

-

"Kung atat na atat kang mamatay para sa bansa, bakit hindi ikaw ang maging presidente?!"

Mabini only stayed as he heard angry footsteps walking from him. He only stayed as he flinched at the loud slam of the double doors and he only stayed as he heard a certain voice curse someone from downstairs. Miong never cursed. He is too soft spoken that cursing sounds more like a 'lambing' than an expression of anger. But not tonight. Tonight Miong cursed and tonight Miong yelled at him. And nothing has ever shaken him the same way as Miong's anger.

He gritted his teeth as he immediately realized that his anger was misplaced. The younger man was worried about him and only wanted him to take a break but no. He had to get his irritation get the best of him and now he's stuck in this room, alone. He never liked being alone. It's too quiet yet too loud. His mind is buzzing and not the good kind.

"Neneng?" He called out once heard small steps approaching behind closed doors. The doors opened to reveal Emilio's sister Felicidad. She's the only one who has ever taken his side in these fights; people always afraid of the greater power.

"Nag away nanaman ba kayo ni kuya?" she asked, as soft spoken as her kuya Miong. He nodded as he gave her the pluma and documents on his lap. Sometimes, it's like she understood them without even being with them.

"Babalik din yun. Hindi ka naman kayang tiisin ni kuya, eh," she smiled softly, assisting him to his bed. "Talagang nagaaway ang mga mag asawa. Normal na yan,"

"Neneng,"

"'Wag mo akong matawag na 'Neneng', kuya Pule. Alam natin parehas na ikaw ang asawa ngayon ni kuya,"

"Ang Pilipinas ang -"

"Si kuya ang asawa mo at kabit ninyo ang batas. Anak ninyo naman ang Pilipinas. Kailangan ng Pilipinas ang mga magulang niya bukas kaya matulog ka na," the small lady scolded kindly, taking the documenta into her arms and giving the blanket one final tap before she stood and headed for the door.

"ako na bahala kay kuya. Tulog na,"

-

"Señor presidente. 'Di pa po ba kayo makatulog?" Emilio turned to see the young general wearing only a kamiso and cotton pants. "Kalagitnaan na po ng gabi, ah?"

"May iniisip lang," he smiled kindly, giving the younger man a light tap on his shoulder. The young general looked hesitant but let it pass. They were looking at the horizon when Gregorio spoke.

"Nagkatampuhan nanaman po ba kayo ng ministro? Narinig ko po kasing lumagabog ang pinto sa bahagi niya ng bahay,"

"Hindi naman sa -"

"Munting pagtatalo. Naiintindihan ko po," the young general smiled and kicked a stone. "Mahirap po talaga ang umiibig. Mas masidhi, mas mabigat sa dibdib,"

"hindi ko -"

"Ang pagibig na inaalay sa dalawang panginoon ay pagibig na nakalilito kung ako ang tatanungin. Isa lang dapat. Parang ngayon. Ang bansa ba ang mahal mo o ang ministro?" asked the young man before standing up from where he has perched himself on a stone and left the president staring after him, confused more than ever.

-

The meeting with the rest of the cabinet members went on as usual: two sides colliding against each other, voices adding to the heat of the weather. Emilio sat quietly on his seat at the cabisera of the table while the minister sat quietly next to him, writing. As always. His forever job in meetings like this.

Luna was shouting something at Paterno when Aguinaldo's attention was captured by the sound of a pencil dropping on the wooden floor. His body's initial reaction is to pick it up and give it to soft hands waiting but not today. He trained his eyes on the letters he received from Manila and ignored as one of the soldiers behind them picked the pencil up to give it to Mabini.

"Salamat, señor," he chanced a look at the soldier and glared briefly before turning back to the letter.

_'Ang bansa ba ang mahal mo o ang ministro?'_

The question echoed inside his head, the letters in front of him nothing but a jumble of scribbles and nothingness. The voices around him sounded so close yet so far.

He loves his country.

But he loves the man beside him more.

And he is in a tight spot because he can't love both.

-

He has had hopes. If Miong picked up that pencil, he would have -

He can't go there. He only gave a small smile to the soldier kind enough to pick up the pencil he dropped and thanked him. If only...

"Miong!" he turned his head upon the name, Miong and Pule not each other's name but of them. The two of them.

It was Mr. Buencamino expectantly waiting for the president to look up from the letter he has been reading for some time now. From where he is sitted, he can see that it is a short telegram. "Bakit hindi natin antayin ang delegasyong padala mula Cervantes? Bilang nasa daan na rin naman na sila. Mukhang mas makakatulong iyon sa pagdedesisyon ukol sa bagay na ito,"

"Ikaw ba ang Presidente?"

"Ikaw ba ang Ministro at kanang kamay ng Pangulo?"


	2. ii. 2018

 

"I don't know with you!"

Miong turned his head and saw the other man's retreating back. It's one of their arguments. Again.

"I was merely trying to explain to you that if you can't understand my point like this then how do you expect yourself to be a good lawyer?" Miong shouted back, answered by the slamming of a door. He was never good with explaining things directly and always talked in riddles. It's both a gift and a curse. And right now, it's proving to be a curse.

"Pule, please. I am trying here,"

"Pule I'm sorry please,"

"Pule,"

"Pu - "

The door opened and his eyes narrowed to the bag on the other's hands.

"I am going back to Nanay's. Magaaral ako. Sort yourself out,"

"Pul -"

"Did I stutter?"

Miong cursed himself inwardly as he watched the other man leave. His heart pushing him to run after the man but his pride holding him to stay. _what will you do, Miong? Stay, Miong. He was a shit head. Yeah but you love that shit head. Whoah whoah love? Check the label, my friend. Alam nating lahat na room mates lang kayo. Yeah room mates who had been living in the same house for almost five yea - don't go there, Miong. Woosh._ Miong shouted a loud 'fuck' before throwing his phone on the wall.

-

_"Fuck!"_

Apolinario flinched as his hand slowly let go of the door handle. It was just a harmless topic. One they've both discussed before: Trust. It never ends like this. Usually they end it on a good note; Miong telling him he's learned something new and Pule telling him it was a good break from his school life. Miong is a researcher for a company and a part-time writer while Pule is a teacher who is still attending law school. More than once Miong told him his desire to continue his studies to law school but often times he's held back by his doubts.

Polar opposites. That's what they are. And often they argue but they supplement each other well. Hell it's one of the reasons why he stayed in that house even though Miong's lonely TEDtalks in his room distracts him most times from his studies or his unresponsiveness making the other estranged.

They fit together so well. So what happened?

And why is he waiting for Miong to run after him?

-

"Wait. So you mean to say na nagaway kayo ni Mabini kasi nag-ginago ka?"

"Yes,"

"Shit bro. He agreed with Tito Andie. He's got it bad," Gregorio whisphered to his tiyo Selo sitting beside him. The older man nodded and threw his handkerchief at the man sulking in front of him.

"I know a lie when I see it. Spill everything,"

"Masama pakiramdam ko tapos pagod ako sa trabaho. Hindi ko napigil,"

"Bakit 'di mo kasi sinabi sa kanya? Akala ko ba mabait yun?" Andie, the ever taga-tagay, poured them all another round.

"Puta sasabihin ko pa ba? Umuwi nga sa nanay nya 'di ba? Isa pa, feeling unwell won't excuse my words. I have to take responsibility," his words burned with the shot of Emperador that was now slowly dripping down his throat. If only bad words can feel this good.

"Your pride will be your doom, 'tay Miong. You better fix that," Greg consoled, patting the other's shoulder before downing his own drink.

-

"You are stressing me out. Why on earth will you run to me? Ano ako? Takbuhan mo kapag nagaaway kayo ng asawa mo?"

"Hindi sa -"

"Oh shut up and come in. Pray na hindi umuwi si Andoy tonight. I heard Miong called him and his other tropa for noma sesh," Jose, or Pepe as his family would call him, explained while he helped the other with his things. Jose saw the disapproval on the other's face upon hearing the information. God he loves playing this game every time.

-

Miong made his way to the toilet and washed his face. He isn't even drunk as he started pouring his shots in Andie's glass after he knew it's safe to do so. He's always done that after coming home drunk one night and receiving a lecture from his room mate.

"Gago ka. Andie's smashed. How will I explain that to Jose?"

"Hayaan mo. Ihatid na lang natin. Jose knows naman how to placate a drunk Andie eh," he chuckled darkly. If anything, he's doing them a favor. Juan, on the other hand...

"Putangina mo, Aguinaldo. This is why the people you love leaves you,"

"Tiyo naman. He's only ever loved one man," Shouted Greg who was apparently listening from on of the stalls.

-

It was a calm night. He likes it when he stays with Jose sometimes. He is a quiet man who has his nose buried in his writings and that gives him the time to focus on his readings too.

But it's too quiet. It's all too quiet.

"You miss Miong," Pule jumped a bit when he heard Jose's voice from across the room. He only stared but he felt his confusion grip his chest.

"You've been humming. And tapping. Both things you've complained about Miong before," Jose was smirking at him and damn if he doesn't want to punch that off his face right now. Instead, he turned back to his book and adjusted his glasses.

"I don't. And I wasn't,"


End file.
